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06 June 2012 @ 10:34 am
Please to send thoughts!  
OK, so I haven't been whining about this at all online, but I'm finally, finally getting to the end of my medication withdrawal and I could really use some thoughts/hugs/support (if anyone remembers me, LOL!).

Short version: I've been on antidepressants for over 10 years and am finally coming off them. I'm down to 25mg of Effexor (from 300mg once upon a time). It's taken over 6 months to get from 150 mg to 25. I'm on Day 3 of 25mg and it's not fun--pains, nausea, aches, chocolate cravings... :p (ok the last bit is not so bad except I think chocolate is not so great for nausea, right?). I am determined to get through it because i have HAD IT with doing this slowly... it just draws out the agony. I'm hoping I can get to zero in a couple of weeks.

Emotionally, I'm feeling strong but just FED UP with it. I have racing thoughts, anxiety (raised heart rate) and nightmares right now but based on previous experience, this is just a result of dropping the medication another step--not a permanent state.

I really wish I didn't have to work--I'd just quit it completely and crawl into bed and be sick for a couple of weeks and then be done. But I can still do this right? I'm planning to reduce to 12.5 next week and then ZERO the week after. That's fast compared to how I've done the other 'drops' but what the hell. I keep thinking 25mg is NOTHING. They don't ever prescribe less than 75mg here anyway... so it can't be actually doing much (other than giving my overly addicted body some fake sense of normalcy!).

Anyway, any kind of cheer at this time would be most welcome!

This entry was originally posted at http://bop-radar.dreamwidth.org/243501.html. comment count unavailable comments Comment here or there, as you will.
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Current Mood: determineddetermined
Current Music: Disco Biscuit Love - The Jezabels
 
 
 
Anoel: got arya pointyanoel on June 6th, 2012 12:50 am (UTC)
*hugs* I really hope you feel better. I had some ear pain a month ago and it was horrible, I felt like I wanted to die. But you can make it through! You're an amazing, wonderful, generous, kind, creatively amazing person who is way better than any pain.

Any chance you're coming to VVC this year? I'd love to see you! In any case, if you want some kind of short Game of Thrones vid (could be just S1 if you want), let me know and I can try to whip it up for you :)
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Nodame rockbop_radar on June 6th, 2012 01:09 am (UTC)
OMG *HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGS*!! Thank you so much!

Ear pain is horrible--I had some and tinnitus for a month or so in this process, but thankfully the pain there never got too dreadful. Sorry you had to suffer it. ;(

Sadly, I won't be making it to VVC this year. Another year, I hope!

OMG, an Arya something!?! 20 seconds? That would be amaaaaaaaazing!
(no subject) - anoel on June 6th, 2012 03:26 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - bop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:44 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Buffy Willow friends hugbop_radar on June 6th, 2012 02:11 am (UTC)
Thank you!!! :D :D
Talitha: suicide_bee Lex Badasstalitha78 on June 6th, 2012 01:23 am (UTC)
Whoa, look at you, kicking that drug's ass. That is some hardcore willpower you've got going there. I admire you so much and I'm cheering you on. Go go go!!!
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 6th, 2012 02:18 am (UTC)
Lexxxxxxx!! I have Smallville nostalgia lately. :D
Thank you so much for the thoughts!! Was thinking of you today--saw a little dog that looked (and barked) like Bubba! :D
Jayne L.: dwwavesserrico on June 6th, 2012 01:34 am (UTC)
Good thoughts --> you. You *can* do it; you *are* doing it. Just a little longer, and then you can cave to all the chocolate cravings in the world. *g*

*hugs*
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Abedbop_radar on June 6th, 2012 02:19 am (UTC)
Damn it, I was totally thinking of caving on the chocolate *today*. :p Nausea or not... (I'm not very sensible this way--not used to nausea so I kind of don't know what to do with it!)

Thank you!!!
pixieladykuwdora on June 6th, 2012 01:38 am (UTC)
*big squishy hugs, ALWAYS BIG SQUISHY HUGS*
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 6th, 2012 02:54 am (UTC)
:D :D Thank you!
counteragentcounteragent on June 6th, 2012 01:53 am (UTC)
You can do it!!!!! Rah rah boppy rah!

Wow, that sounded a lot more like a cheerleader and a lot less like a dinosaur in my head...
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Shahrukh partybop_radar on June 6th, 2012 03:00 am (UTC)
Oh, I'm down with a dinosaur!! :D Sounds fun....
Raprap541 on June 6th, 2012 02:19 am (UTC)
You can do it! I had to wean myself off wellbutrin and I did it and you can do it!
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Aishwarya lanternbop_radar on June 6th, 2012 03:03 am (UTC)
Ohhhh, great work! Good to hear from those who have been through it!
Dara Qdaraq on June 6th, 2012 02:39 am (UTC)
Best wishes for good health and happiness!
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 6th, 2012 04:13 am (UTC)
Thank you! :)
Nora Norwichnorwich36 on June 6th, 2012 02:44 am (UTC)
Sending good thoughts in your direction!
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 6th, 2012 04:17 am (UTC)
Thank you!! (((())))
darluludarlulu on June 6th, 2012 02:51 am (UTC)
*BIG HUGS*

I've been where you are and I know you can do it! You're in the home stretch! <3333333

- the ljer formerly known as keewick
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:25 am (UTC)
Ack, LJ ate my response!! But bit thank yous!! It's so encouraging to hear from other's who got through this. :) I sometimes feel crap that it's taken me so long but everyone's path is different I guess.

Thanks for identifying yourself too--congrats on the name change!
chasa: bondchasarumba on June 6th, 2012 05:06 am (UTC)
You CAN do it -- look at how far you've come! Sending you cheering thoughts (and virtual fantasy nausea-reducing chocolate ;-)) and the very best wishes.
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:25 am (UTC)
:D That chocolate sounds marvelous... :D Thank you so much!
amnisiasamnisias on June 6th, 2012 07:52 am (UTC)
Ah, that's the existential question: to be or not to be to pull of the plaster fast or slowly... I guess there's something to be said for both approaches, but at this small dose I'd be biased towards the dropping the dose as quickly as possible and be done with it approach. Shame you can't take off a few days to get through it.

Chocolate craving make total sense, btw, because most antidepressents including Venlafaxine are Seratonine re-uptake inhibitors to various degrees. Chocolate contains Seratonine (but you'd have to eat tons of the stuff to get to therapeutic levels ;)). So I guess this is your instincts coming through, like animals who chew the willow tree bark if they're sick, to get to the aspirin. Which shows how amazing nature is. This is my positive thought of the day for you!
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Lex golden fieldbop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:28 am (UTC)
Yeah .. it's so damn tempting, but then my boyfriend looks pretty worried when I suggest it. ;) After all, he's the one that has to watch me get sick and/or cry/scream/mope ...

I agree that the chocolate cravings are actually a sign of my body trying to find another way to chemically alleviate itself ... am just trying to help it along in somewhat more healthy ways. ;) It's a good thought--nature is definitely amazing!
(no subject) - amnisias on June 7th, 2012 07:30 am (UTC) (Expand)
Echostir_of_echoes on June 6th, 2012 08:12 am (UTC)
Good luck, hon you're doing great :)
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:29 am (UTC)
Thank you!! :)
Becka: kara is fiercebeccatoria on June 6th, 2012 04:57 pm (UTC)
*hugs and support*

I've watched Kev have to deal with reductions of antidepressants and he wasn't on as much for as long and it was still hard. Your resolve is fucking awesome. Do not forget this.
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!: Lana :Dbop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:33 am (UTC)
Thank you! Certainly helps to hear of others who have been through it. Am still feeling sick today, but not unbearably so. Am seriously inclined to just pull myself off it entirely next week and get through some illness... but we'll see what my psych has to say about that plan later this arvo. ;)
Ms Cranky Pants of the Depresso Blogbofoddity on June 6th, 2012 05:18 pm (UTC)
All the hugs and support to you! ♥♥♥♥♥
K, Bop or Boppy--take your pick!bop_radar on June 7th, 2012 01:34 am (UTC)
Thank you!!! I am close now... pretty pissed at how my body is dependent on even these micro amounts but hey, it can be taught differently! *bosses it*